The Workplace Coach

Think about what it might be like to work for you.  How do you think your team feel about coming in to work every day? Are they inspired?  Motivated?  Engaged?  Maybe you think they are but how can you be sure?

I just finished up a job for a client looking into allegations of bullying and harassment against the boss.  The aggrieved staff member felt as though they had been unfairly treated by their boss, undermined, belittled and humiliated in front of their peers, and that the boss should be made to answer for their behaviour. It was also clear in this instance that the boss didn’t think they had done anything wrong and that they had nothing to apologise for. There was a significant power imbalance in this relationship, the boss being very senior and the employee at a quite junior level.

Of interest in this case too was the relationship before the incident that brought everything unstuck.  The employee in her own words said that the two of them had got along well, that they had a close working relationship, that they had shared personal stories about their lives outside of work with each other, and in her view were reasonably good friends.

Now I’m not going to get into the actual incident but let’s just say that I am certain there was no intent on the part of the boss to humiliate the employee.  The boss did act hastily and without really thinking through the possible impact of their actions, but I think this was more a case of thoughtlessness while under significant work and time pressure, while dealing with a million things all at once rather than a case of bullying or harassment.  Most of us can probably relate right?   Many of us, I suspect, might have done something at some time that unintentionally upset someone else, by acting (or reacting) without fully thinking it through.  That’s called being human.

Where this case really came apart, and where the boss failed, in my opinion, is that they did not acknowledge how their actions impacted their employee.  They did not have the emotional intelligence or self-awareness to recognise that what they did might have upset the employee and/or made them look bad in front of their peers.  The second failure is that even when the boss became aware of how the employee was feeling, they still refused to admit that they were (or even entertain the possibility that they might have been) at fault.  They gave the employee one of those “I’m sorry you feel that way” apologies, which as we all know, is neither an apology nor an admission.

The short story is that the boss acted without thinking about their employee, and then, failed to accept that they may have messed up and offered a sincere apology.  This small incident could have been smoothed over quickly and without all the fuss through an open and honest conversation in the first instance. Instead, it turned into a big ugly misconduct investigation involving a handful of people (some very senior), and me doing interviews, taking statements and digging into allegations of bullying and harassment against the boss.  It really didn’t have to go that way. 

In a perfect world we would all be great at emotional intelligence; we would leave our egos out of our relationships at work; and we would have the self-awareness to understand how the people we work with actually experience us.  I don’t think anyone reading this article would deliberately set out to make an employee’s life at work miserable… but what if you were doing it unintentionally?  On a daily basis?

The Workplace Coach is currently offering the ‘Would I want to work for me?’ awareness package.  This is a behaviourally based assessment tool that will show you exactly how your boss, your peers and your team all experience you in the workplace. This unique tool is designed to provide you with the knowledge and awareness to dramatically improve your leadership effectiveness at work.    

For a limited time, you can get all three components including: 1) the 360-degree LSI 1 and LSI 2 assessment, 2) a 90-minute assessment debrief, and 3) two follow up coaching sessions to help you increase your effectiveness in leading your teams and yourself. This package is priced at $2490 (plus GST) and is completely COVID Safe and delivered virtually. Please contact us at info@theworkplacecoach.com.au

The Workplace Coach