The Workplace Coach

Let’s start with a hard truth: Many people in leadership or management roles got promoted to to these positions based on either their individual job performance or tenure.  It is unlikely that they were selected for their natural ability to effectively lead, serve, and engage other human beings to be and do their best.

The unfortunate reality is that way too many managers aren’t really equipped to inspire and motivate their people — especially with their words. And while action speaks louder than words, saying the wrong things can be devastating to an employee.

In toxic workplaces, passive aggressive phrases or hateful words used to attack and demean others will contribute directly to high stress levels, reduced employee engagement and morale and low productivity.

Here are five phrases that great leaders will never say.

1. “I don’t need anybody else’s opinion. This is the direction we’re headed.”

You’ll never hear this phrase coming from a boss who places their teams first. They will seek perspective from several angles. When difficult situations arise, they talk to people cross-functionally — up and even down reporting levels — to get clarity and determine a course of action. When they arrive at a decision, sometimes the decision may not be popular; but it’s always the right one because they have sought and considered many views and opinions.

2. “I’m not responsible for that.”

The best leaders resist the tendency to deflect responsibility and cast blame elsewhere to protect themselves. They accept that they’re not perfect and that they make mistakes. So when they make mistakes, they admit them. They recognize that they are accountable to others below their line of sight, not just to those above them. When leaders model this type of authenticity, employees feel safe enough to take risks, make their own mistakes, and be open enough to say, “Hey, boss, I messed up.”

3. “I don’t need more training. I know everything there is to know.”

Few things are as infuriating as leaders who think they’re above it all, including their own need to be a better leader. Good bosses are willing to learn and gladly accept the role of a continuing learner among their team members. Great leaders know that they have much to learn, and that each person has something important to teach them. The truth is that leaders don’t always know what is needed and what to do. They are willing to listen before making suggestions. They ask questions and are sincerely interested in the answers.

4. “That’s why I hired you. Figure it out yourself.”

Yes, we hire smart and creative people to do complex and ingenious things. But when an employee comes to you for guidance, great leaders leverage the opportunity to coach them to success. According to one study, fewer than half of organizations surveyed had implemented coaching as a part of their performance-management process. The few that did — you guessed it — were high-performing organizations.

5. “It is what it is.”

When you hear this empty phrase from a boss, you can bet he just dismissed something that is important or worthy of further discussion as the opposite. It’s a sign of lazy discourse. Good bosses are willing to engage others in deeper conversation to explore solutions, new ideas, or solve problems together. While this phrase may be something you say to your friends about something that happens in your personal life, in a professional setting as a leader it just exposes you as a lazy thinker.

If you are looking to help your managers become better leaders, you could start by organising a coaching appointment for them with The Workplace Coach.